Notes on the Paranoid Construct

The human brain is an organ; if it did not function to promote the survival of the animal, it would not exist. The mind is a function of the brain; no one knows whether the human mind perceives reality or even whether there is reality. The mind perceives what it perceives. No one knows whether Christ actually ever lived; if he did live, no one knows why St. Paul, who certainly did live, chose to use this rather obscure Jewish cult to promote his strange world view. For two thousand years, human beings, who use their brains to make sense of perceptions and sensory input, have chosen to use the odd writings of this misogynist to make sense of what they either do not, in fact, understand, or simply choose not to understand.
In the same way humans, in order to go on sensing whatever they sense and to believe they have some control of what they perceive to exist, choose to believe that there is order in the universe and that they can perceive and understand that order. Whether or not the order exists, humans evidently have a biological need to find it or impose it. They must also validate these beliefs by either convincing other humans of their interpretations or imposing those interpretations on other human beings.
Humans are organisms; therefore they function in response to both their own natures and to external stimuli. All conscious human beings are biologically required to find order; the individual order will be determined by the interaction of the individual's physical brain and sensory input Something happens at the same time as something else. It rains more than usual; the river overflows; different plants grow; a monkey is seen to eat a plant and not die. A miracle; god has sent manna to feed his people. The story is told over and over and over; someone learns to write grocery lists from someone else; someone else realizes the flood story can be written. Five hundred years later, someone realizes the power, majesty, and good ness of god can be shown from this miraculous monkey story. Order prevails; god knows all; the death of your daughter from cholera is caused by the fact that she did not serve her father fast enough. Truth has been found. Order, religion, god, no insanity.
A child's father tries to beat the family dog to death in the bathroom on Sunday afternoon with a board from the yard because the father believes that dogs love you if you are good. This dog is proving him to be bad; the dog must die. The child stands outside that bathroom door until someone beats it down and lets her in. She picks up the dog in her arms; she lays him on her bed; she cleans up the bathroom. She has the balls of god. She is a true lover. She needs her dad; this is inconceivable. It did not happen; it is never mentioned again. When she comes home from the school the next afternoon, the animal is gone; life goes on. Dinner is served; her older sister holds her in her arms in bed to protect her from the screaming. The child grows up to believe the world is evil and out to get her. Is she irrational? Crazy? Her body freezes sometimes on the floor. She cannot eat although she is hungry; she cannot smoke although the craving is tearing at her brain. She sees patterns of evil everywhere, and her brain folds. Her hands shake; she is terrified and furious. She is paranoid.
She believes everyone is talking about her; the joke is everyone is talking about her. The two things have almost nothing to do with one another. She would believe that whether there were anyone else alive or not. She is from a big family of lovers; they talk whether she cares or not. Both things are true; different sets of facts. She believes the people at her job hate her and are plotting against her; she believes she is lesbian; she believes her doctor gives a fuck. The people where she works are a major international oil company; of course they are absolutely corrupt and they plot day and night. They are in fact more paranoid than she is. That is irrelevant to her belief that they are evil. She would believe that whether they were or not. That is her illness. She likes sex; she may or may not be lesbian; that is also irrelevant. Her doctor would for sure sell her out for a bigger office any day of the week, and he is probably studying her. If it kills her, too bad; she was crazy and dispensable. But for his career to work out, she must believe he cares. Order, hers and his. She is paranoid; he is not. He is middle class, white American, and he believes firmly in Jesus. Her suicide is incidental and acceptable in the name of research. Money will be made. He is sane; she believes he does not want her dead. She is crazy. Both organisms reproduce; both eat, sleep, and find order. Both work; one suffers agony; the other exploits it; life goes on or not.